Dear God, the Salt and Pepper shakers are -armed-.

These ducks kept showing up at the BBQ, staring at the grills. Like they were thinking the burgers were for them...or maybe they kept toying with the idea they could be next, in a sick form of Duck Disaster Porn. One of them kept quacking at us like it was asking, "Hey, those burgers done yet?"

These ducks scare me.

dklegman captures me with my new acquisition - the Master Replicas "Sting" that was on sale at Toys 'R' Us. I look like Meat Loaf with a glowing meat cleaver.

This could be a whole Fight Club fanfic.