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Jan. 17th, 2003 12:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bzarcherAs any of you who also read ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
skarlette's journal already know, she has the opportunity of a lifetime before her. Everything she's ever wanted to do, travel, excitement, and new experiences.
Yes. I told her to go for it. Yes. I told her to go for the interview and take the job if she gets the offer.
Yes, I told her to be happy, even if it means I may not see her for years at a time.
This will mark the 4th time I have told someone I loved very deeply (at one level or another, not all romantically), that I would rather have them be happy than be somewhere that I might be with them.
It hurts. But I know it's the right thing to do.
So, after tucking her into bed and wishing her sweet dreams, why can't I sleep?
I keep telling myself that as long as I'm doing the right thing, I'm able to look myself in the mirror.
So why does the 'right thing' keep meaning I'm going to be alone?
Truly, I must have -really- pissed in someone's wheaties in a past life.
(And yes, I know that I am assuming she will be asked to take the position after interviews and the rest. I do so because I know she is someone who would do the job wonderfully, would possess excellent dedication to the post, would be more than skilled in accomplishing her tasks, and would do an excellent job of educating and caring for the children she would be asked to tend to. I assume she will get the job because I know that she is the best. I would probably be far less concerned if I didn't believe she was capable of the job. Perhaps that's part of what's different? On 2 previous occasions where this situation came up, I told them to try, but I doubted the people in question would succeed. But her...no. I have no doubt in my mind that <lj user="skarlette" will succeed.)
skarlette's journal already know, she has the opportunity of a lifetime before her. Everything she's ever wanted to do, travel, excitement, and new experiences.Yes. I told her to go for it. Yes. I told her to go for the interview and take the job if she gets the offer.
Yes, I told her to be happy, even if it means I may not see her for years at a time.
This will mark the 4th time I have told someone I loved very deeply (at one level or another, not all romantically), that I would rather have them be happy than be somewhere that I might be with them.
It hurts. But I know it's the right thing to do.
So, after tucking her into bed and wishing her sweet dreams, why can't I sleep?
I keep telling myself that as long as I'm doing the right thing, I'm able to look myself in the mirror.
So why does the 'right thing' keep meaning I'm going to be alone?
Truly, I must have -really- pissed in someone's wheaties in a past life.
(And yes, I know that I am assuming she will be asked to take the position after interviews and the rest. I do so because I know she is someone who would do the job wonderfully, would possess excellent dedication to the post, would be more than skilled in accomplishing her tasks, and would do an excellent job of educating and caring for the children she would be asked to tend to. I assume she will get the job because I know that she is the best. I would probably be far less concerned if I didn't believe she was capable of the job. Perhaps that's part of what's different? On 2 previous occasions where this situation came up, I told them to try, but I doubted the people in question would succeed. But her...no. I have no doubt in my mind that <lj user="skarlette" will succeed.)
