On the matter of progeny.

[bzarcher]

skarlette heard some of this yesterday...or the day before? I forget which. But. I decided something kinda major about my life.

I'm not gonna have kids.

I love skarlette, and believe me, I am all about the lovemaking. But not kids. Not just because I've been dealing with all these stupid camper brats all month, either.

First, there is the fact that m'lady is not interested in them, and I admit that got me considering the possibility of not having them. But she was not the major factor in my decision.

Second, the fact that while I am a good short-term caretaker (babysitter, teacher, etx), I really don't think I'm capable of long-term. My temper's not cut out for it, and I'm not sure I can give them the treatment a child would deserve. (Yes, my treatment by my father affected this decision. But I don't think it makes it any less valid.)

Third, I'm a gamer, a computer nerd, and occasionally a writer or painter. None of these lifestyles are terribly safe for kids to be around until certain ages, and pawning the kid off onto my beloved mate while I had fun and she didn't doesn't seem fair.

Fourth....well...fourth is that I honestly can't imagine myself as a father. Lover, boyfriend, someday maybe a husband, yes. I can imagine those. But not a father.

Fifth, I'm waiting the various genetic defects in my family pop up with alarming speed in increasing generations, including my sister and several of my cousins, to say nothing of the non-weight related health problems of my parents and grandparents on both sides of the family.

Sixth, I don't know what I want to do with my life, and that seems like it would shut a lot of doors.

Seventh is that I think Cats will give me all the headaches, 3am terror, and regular expenses I'll ever need.

I know some of these may seem dumb to people. But the more I think about this, the more comfortable I am with it.

Now, I may change my mind in the future, sure. But for now, I'm gonna stick with this.

Comments

Don't Be Ashamed...Be Proud!

[doomflower.livejournal.com]

You know what's going to work for you when it comes to parenting plans. Listen to your heart -- don't let society dictate what path you should walk down.

I had a 3-week period of my life when I was jonesing for a baby. To this day, I think it was just teenage hormones. Once they went away, so did that desire, right out the window. Don't want 'em, don't need 'em.

You can find like minds at childfree!

Oh, believe me, I'm not ashamed.

[bzarcher.livejournal.com]

It just took a lot to figure out just what I did want. We'll see how things go. :D I dunno if I need the full community backup, but I'm pretty open right now.

[grandmoff.livejournal.com]

I think of kids and pets the same way: They're great when they belong to someone else.

Anyhow, all I need a kid for is an vessel to house my being when this body wears out, and by the time that happens, I'm sure I will have already purchased a superior clone body.

Devil's advocate!

[demeterschild.livejournal.com]

You sound like Steve, but the most doubtful of people make the best parents.

And, as for fun, that's why there are "aunts" to watch the little ones.

Just another reason for both of you to live near me. *grin*

And, you can always adopt and get a kid with none of your genetic disorders.

You two may change your minds in the future, but kids now are definately a bad idea.

*grins* When /aren't/ you the devil...?

[bzarcher.livejournal.com]

I know. And yes, I could certainly reconsider in the future, and so could she.

But right now, no, I don't see it happening.

Besides, it'll give skarlette and I the pleasure of spoiling your and Steve's brats rotten.

(Assuming we are together then. Which I would love. A lot. In fact, tons. But I won't promise that without at least consulting her, first. ;D)