(no subject)

[bzarcher]

I know this is a totally Pisces thought, but...

I'm so sick and fucking tired of seeing people I care about have their lives turned to shit by people, including family members, who don't give a shit about hurting others. So. Fucking. Tired. Of. It.

Part of me, after listening to a friend in Toronto who is being badly emotionally abused BY HER OWN FUCKING MOTHER, wants to give in to a lot of the rage, and frustration, and sheer fucking strength I have inside, and do something about it. Something nice, and wet, and red. But I know that's not gonna do anything, especially since I don't even have a car. But still.

I haven't hit someone outside of sparring matches for.....5 years. I wish I could do it again. Really, really badly.

Comments

[sehkmet.livejournal.com]

Oh, Pi.

You have no idea how much I know what you mean. 'Blood makes the grass grow greener!' I've been wanting to test that theory...

I love my mother dearly, I truly do. I just... she doesn't know how to handle Tempest and I. She doesn't know what to do with an adult daughter and still tends to forget I'm just that -- an adult. And when I dare to remind her, she gets all up in arms about it. I really do think it's mostly because I'm seeing someone that she's rattled and acting weird.

She's always been like that, though, overbearing and the like, ever since my father left. Sometimes I used to think she missed him so much she's taking his place. She loves to pick on the fact I'm overweight -- not a single day goes by without me getting a disparaging look due to my weight, or an equally disparaging comment. She especially loves to put it on Tempest: "Oh, sure, he says he loves you now, but you put on any more weight and he'll leave."

(I know I've gained about five pounds due to the fact that at school I sit on my ass a lot in front of my computer, or doing schoolwork, and eat kinda bad while MUSHing -- M&Ms are perfect MUSH food, except for the whole fattening thing. :>)

I just dunno. I want my freedom before she smothers me. I can't breathe, that's what it feels like. And I can't stand my little brother either, but that's a whole different kettle of bitching.

--S.

[avylin.livejournal.com]

You guys are good at worrying me.

Buzz-archer (hee hee!), don't worry. *hug* Everybody has those thoughts from time to time. Hell, I want to pound on my cats when they're stubborn about coming inside. I think it's completely natural to get pissed to the point of considering violence... just don't act on it, and you're fine. That you get worked up about folks you care about speaks well of you, but that's IMHO.

And Vain! You! Gnar. I don't know much about your situation (or anything more than what I can osmose from listening in on the MUSH,) but I wish I could help. Um... well, look at the bright side! Sorta. You prolly don' have to put up with living with her too much longer- and even then, for now, only for the summer and whatnot. *hugs* Stick it out, you can do eet!

Oh, and yeah. M&Ms. ::nibbles on taffee:: MUSHing will do that to you.

[bzarcher.livejournal.com]

*hugs to both of you*

Thanks. :D

[sehkmet.livejournal.com]

You're sweethearts, the pair of you. :)

Thank you. It's folks like you that give me that extra push to keep trudging through every day.

--S.

[bzarcher.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Even more evil is the fact I originally read that as "fudging through every day"...